There are some days when I dont have much to do in the office, maybe some minor things yeah, but not anything great.
Today was one such day. So I decided to go through one of my favourite blogs written by a friend of mine. In one of his entries he had given the perfect description of a person's reactions when confronted with someone they have some special feelings for. It took me back to a conversation both of us were having a couple of days back on a similar topic. About that feeling of discomfort when we come face to face with someone we have a 'crush' on.
Well I was just wondering, why is it that we feel so uncomfortable and start acting like complete idiots? I have been there too. Cant string a sentence together, your throat feels dry, your ears turn red etc. etc. etc. Shouldnt it be the exact opposite? Shouldnt it be like the first time you meet that person and it feels as if you have known each other for a lifetime? You should feel most comfy around them. I mean whats the point of being with someone who makes you feel awkward? But then I think I am getting confused between a 'crush' and 'love' or not!!!
But still it is wierd isnt it? You might have been friends with a person forever and you have had the best times with him/her. But the moment the feelings from your side or the other person's side get deeper things become difficult. Why? Neither of you have changed then where does the awkwardness come from?
I still remember my first crush in school. Damn the moment he came in front of me I could never think straight. I used to love to hang out with him, and we have had some great times together. But there were times when I behaved like a complete idiot around him. But now, now that he has someone in his life, I am so much at ease with him. I have not seen him for a long time now, but the last time I met him it was like meeting an old and a good friend. It felt good. I felt free. I have tried to analyse it so many times but always hit a blank wall. I just dont get it, probably never will.